It’s all Carly Rae Jepsen’s fault my tri blew today. Her fucking song “call me maybe” happens to be the worst piece of shit out there. And it was stuck in my head for 25 miles of the bike. And some of the run.
Well I guess it’s my fault, but I really dislike the person that was humming it in transition (who has time to hum in transition?!) because it then got in my head. That song is like herpes, you can’t get rid of it no matter how hard you try. At least with the song it will eventually work its way out of your head until some other asshat sings it.
So, 25 miles of the bike? Wait, thought it was 39 miles. Yeah. I dropped down to the Oly during the race. I feel like such a failure. But I’ve taken what I’ve stewed about all day and created a list of like 30 items I need to work on before the 70.3. I’ll just summarize the big points.
- Negativity – Just like this horrible song, once negativity creeps into my head during a race, it’s over. I have a very hard time recovering and today I didn’t. I got out onto the bike and was going pretty strong, then I hit the hills on the back end of the reservoir and my speed dropped, below my target MPH. So I immediately thought “how the fuck are you supposed to do this next month?” I started having doubt about racing the 70.3 and thought about putting my 70.3 debut off until Cedar Point in September. I was able to pick up pace in other spots and the other bikers are so encouraging. Any time I got passed the other biker would shout out a word of encouragement. I think the racing community overall is pretty supportive.
- HYDRATE, HYDRATE, HYDRATE – this race snuck up on me this week and as I realized on the bike, I was not hydrated enough. When all said and done, I raced for almost 4 hours and was up 3 hours before that and only peed once at 5 a.m. That’s a problem. I should be going every 2-3 hours. By the time I got to the end of the 2nd lap of the bike I knew a 3rd wasn’t in me. I just decided at that point to drop down to Oly. I’m proud that I actually listened to my body for once, so I guess it’s small victories.
- Butter the parts – It’s probably a good thing that I didn’t have to pee on the bike because I didn’t have enough Belgium Butter on the right parts and rubbed my back upper thighs pretty bad in the bike. That woulda stung like a motha’ for sure. Just when you think you have enough butta’ on, butta’ some more. and then some more.
- Nutrition – I’m glad I got to practice my nutrition plan for the 70.3 today. By the time I got to the run, although I was dehydrated, I was sloshing like a Santa with a bowl full of jelly. I suspect that I was too dehydrated to process all the water I had on the bike? I had my prescribed amount, but some of the nutrition choices did not sit so well with me. I felt awful sick and sloshing on top of that sucked. I’ll talk to Heather and make some adjustments. For once I was prepared early with a plan more than a month out, another victory.
I finished the Oly so I can’t completely beat myself up. I’m still well ahead of my Chicago time from last year, so that’s a plus, just gotta put it all in perspective.
At least I didn’t drop an entire bottle of nutrition (entire day’s worth) like I did last month at the Muncie tri. The slippery little fucker flew out of my hand as I was pulling it from my jersey. It was like the oyster that went flying in Pretty Woman. I saw it go in slow motion in an arch over my head and into the woods. It was like the Christmas Story when Ralphie looses the lugnuts “ohhhhh fudge, but not fudge, I had said it, the word, the f dash, dash, dash word.” Although mine was more like “Mother fucker are you fucking kidding me?!”
On a final note. My life right now is like an episode of Cheers. Everyone knows my name. Everywhere I go. I can only assume it’s because there aren’t many fat girls in the Indy triathlon circuit, so I stand out and am easy to remember. I had a guy today say “hey Chrissy! remember me?” um, no, but nice to see you again. I was working a water station in the middle of bum fuck nowhere for Team in Training and some guy out for his own cycle stopped and said “You were at the May Muncie tri, weren’t you? I got out of the water right before you” um… okay how did you recognize me going by 18mph on a bike? I walked into a gas station after the Geist half marathon (okay a sausage in a tutu is pretty memorable) and said “hi Chrissy.” I was like who are you, I’m pretty good at recognizing faces but this one I had never seen before. Turns out he saw my picture on facebook that week in one of his friends pictures. I’m glad that people like me enough to say hi and are patient with me as I kindly ask their name again. Although it’s frustrating, because I’m pretty good with names and don’t want people to feel bad that I don’t remember.
I am going to work my little heart out these next four weeks. Nutrition will be spot on, my new name will be Chrissy “Brick” Vasquez. No excuses, no regrets. I want to make my friends and family so proud when I cross that 70.3 finish line, but most of all, I want to be proud.
Sausage in a Wetsuit 
Chrissy, you my dear are teaching us all so much!! But what I want to tell you is this- no matter what your results today or yesterday or tomorrow….the battle and the victory are in the journey itself. Do not beat yourself up like a crazy woman in a kitchen with a rolling pin. You are amazing, you are inspiring, and you my dear are Legend! Robbin
LikeLike
Chrissy, you are a warrior , so inspiring – not sure if you have seen the video online to that Carly Rae song, but there's a shirtless guy in the video – so like that shirtless guy running in your neighborhood you might like it – if you have never seen the video – do watch it once there is a funny surprise towards the end. ironic I guess – your right about that song being on all the f-ing time catchy annoying – first time I saw it was last month when the Harvard Baseball team video went viral and then on the Today show the spoofed it – I almost posted it on your FB wall but refrained. but I think \”call me maybe\” still could be your theme song since last time I asked call me I thought maybe it might not happen – But seriously you need to get a couple of GO to songs.. that you like Nelly's Country Grammar or whatever song you LOVE on your ipod… maybe some training song that is your ANTHEM. then next time some crappy song gets in your head you will think of your favorites… best of luck in the coming races – thanks for sharing
LikeLike